In the 1930s, Lillian worked as a bookkeeper in a boarding house in Paterson, New Jersey. Paul was working as a house painter and was active in the democratic party in Paterson.
We know they were dating as early as 1936 as Paul was in the family picture at the wedding of Lillian’s brother Sydney.
Top Row: George, Sidney, Bill, Helen, Paul
Bottom Row: Katie, Lakey, Isador, Lillian
Were they already “promised” to each other? Before becoming officially engaged, Paul gave Lillian a pre-engagement ring with a little diamond in it. She eventually had that ring reset for me as a pinky ring.
While they were dating, Lillian lived at home with her parents at 739 E. 24th Street in Paterson. Paul lived at home with his family at 121 Albion Street in Paterson. It would have taken about 27 minutes to walk from one house to the other. There were also buses they could take if they did not want to walk.
Lillian Kirsch married Paul Rothman in circa 1937. He was about 35 years old and Lillian was about 28. From looking at this chart, we can see that they were older than the average newly married couple in the 1930s.
Why did Lillian choose to wear a black wedding dress? Her sister-in-law, Lakey who married before her, also did. It could have been her personal choice but, also, the country was still in the midst of the Great Depression (1929 – 1939) and black fabric was less expensive than white satin. Traditional wedding dresses were considered a luxury during this time of hardship. Maybe these young couples did not want to put a financial strain on their families and chose to be practical.
When Lillian told her boss, the owner of the boarding house, that she was getting married, he asked her what she wanted as a wedding present. She looked around his office and pointed to a lamp in a corner of the room. He told her she could have it and to take it, so she did.
When we moved into our house, she insisted I have it. At that point, it had been tucked away in a closet for years and it needed new wiring and a new lampshade. Lillian took it to a lamp store, had it rewired, and picked out a new lamp shade. I did not appreciate it at the time, but now I consider it a family treasure.
After they were married, Paul and Lillian first lived at 638 E. 22nd Street in Paterson, which was just 2 streets away from her family.
Lillian loved her mother’s cooking and as a young bride, she really did not know how to cook. Every day while her new husband was at work, she would sneak over to her mother’s house and bring home food her mother had cooked for them for dinner.
One day her mother was sick and could not cook. Lillian was beside herself as she had no dinner for Paul. When he came home, he expected a delicious dinner. When he saw none, he asked Lillian why she hadn’t cooked that day. She was mortified, but finally admitted the truth that Paul had been enjoying her mother’s cooking all this time.
Little by little, she learned to cook and over the years became an excellent cook herself.
Sources
- Median Marriage Ages https://www.infoplease.com/us/family-statistics/median-age-first-marriage-1890-2010
- Google Map showing the distance between Paul’s and Lillian’s family homes. https://www.google.com/maps/dir/739+E+24th+St,+Paterson,+NJ+07504/121+Albion+Avenue,+Paterson,+NJ/@40.9177083,-74.1784379,14.5z/am=t/data=!4m14!4m13!1m5!1m1!1s0x89c2fc3f05eb3da5:0x106862c27a9fd3d6!2m2!1d-74.150921!2d40.9150764!1m5!1m1!1s0x89c2fdb89a3099c5:0x5849ffa78843656c!2m2!1d-74.1866196!2d40.9225147!3e3?entry=ttu